Defense Mechanisms in Postpartum

“Perfect and bulletproof are seductive, but they don’t exist in the human experience.” - Brene Brown

When I first read this quote in the book, Daring Greatly, by Brene Brown, it struck me to my core. 

Perfectionism and being bulletproof had been my lifelong defense mechanisms.

Something I learned real quick after my first daughter was born is that perfectionism and being bulletproof are not only unrealistic to the human experience, but they *especially* do not exist in parenthood.

In this week’s newsletter, I wrote about how I navigated losing my layers of armor - perfectionism and being bulletproof - when I became a parent. 

It was terrifying. And liberating. But mostly terrifying.

Life is hard. Parenthood is *hard*. 

Defense mechanisms, like perfectionism and being bulletproof, are so common and I wish parents would talk about this more. 

While it felt vulnerable for me to break these defense mechanisms down, this experience also opened up opportunities for the deep connections I have always wanted, especially with my babies.

Do any of you notice perfectionism and being bulletproof in your lives? 

In what ways have they served you? 

In what ways have they inhibited growth? 

What would it be like to let these defense mechanisms go?

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