Eating Disorders Through An IFS Lens
There are protector parts, called managers, and they are PROACTIVE. They try to step in, before you feel overwhelmed.
When an eating disorder acts as a manager, it could look like counting calories, prioritizing exercise over everything else, and planning your next binge/purge.
There are also protector parts, called firefighters, and they are REACTIVE. They step in after you feel overwhelmed, and do what they need to put the ‘fire’ (pain, distress, etc.) out.
When an eating disorder acts as a firefighter, it could look like, restricting for a long period of time, impulsively purging, and numbing through binge-eating.
Regardless of whether it is a manager or firefighter, it is always protecting an inner wound.
These wounds could look like:
You grew up in a chaotic home, and having control in your life is the only way you feel ‘safe’.
You experienced emotional abuse during your childhood, and feel unworthy of goodness and nourishment
You grew up believing you were bad, and any reminder of that feeling is too painful to hold.
These protector parts, like eating disorders, have good intentions. They genuinely believe they are taking care of you. They believe they are protecting you from these scary feelings.
Through IFS, we connect with these protective parts and let them know they can relax.
It is a whole process, that is too extensive to list here, but there is one thing you can do:
Name it. When we name it, we can help tame it.
So, if you resonate with any of this, naming your eating disorder part can be powerful.
Maybe it looks like, “Hey [eating disorder part], I see you are feeling upset right now and feel you need to protect me.”
That’s it. Validation. Let that part know you see it, so it can ease a bit.
I hope this helps!